Paul is dead! The drummer for one of my all time favorite bands apparently committed suicide. To do something like that when you have two kids is just unimaginable. To what depths had his depression taken him? What things were so pressing on his mind that they would lead him to such a drastic response?
Death is...what do I say? Final? Obviously, but what if you're a Christian? That it would be the beginning of something greater, is easy to say but hard to believe. If I have a strong faith in God, why does death scare me? Maybe it's the process of death that I fear. Folks always say they want to go in their sleep, no suffering. I agree with the no suffering, who would want to lie in pain for days or be like Terry Schiavo, trapped in a body that will no longer respond to your commands? But on the same token, wouldn't it be nice to have some notice, like that afforded by notice of a terminal condition, so that I could get all my shit together? Say goodbye to friends, arrange for my kids to be cared for, etc. But who's to say I would use my time wisely?
I don't know what I'm trying to work out here. I just don't want to die right now.
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